Tuesday, September 29, 2009

I Had a Dream

Quiet as kept, I was given notice by my employer that my services will no longer be needed as of contract's end September 30th. Their reasoning, I was late multiple (5) times. 4 of which had no effect on classes or scheduling. However, I owned up to my (lack of) responsibility with no ill will or hard feelings. That is, until I was notified by other employees, that they'd been late at least that many times, and have had little to no threats/consequences sent their way. Couple that with a scenario in which I witnessed a new employee make the exact same mistake at the exact same school that I made in my 1st week on the job, (mis-reading my schedule and being late on account of it.) and receive not nearly the degree of penalty or 'warnings' that had me fearing for my life(job) just 3 weeks into the country.

Regardless of the dynamics surrounding the decision, ultimately I am done as of tomorrow. This left me in an interesting situation. To stay or not to stay. What to do? I immediately blasted out resumes everywhere I could. In the teaching industry it is pretty easy to get a job. Or so I was told. I didn't hear back from anyone at first. Then gradually interviews started aligning, mostly for part time work. But that was much more liberating than my current situation which required working on Saturdays and Sundays.

Yet, all the while I was flirting with making a move back to the States.

Just when it seemed to be a toss up, I had a dream that very clearly told me where my next step shouldn't be!

I don't really remember how it began, but I do recall glancing over and locking eyes with my grandfather. This was a bit extraordinary as he passed away a good 10 years ago. And I haven't seen him in a dream for at least 3 years. However, it should be noted that he remains my primary ancestor, in terms of prayers and guidance. I always feel his presence is closest. At least amongst those I can name and recognize.

Astonished by the sight of him, I all but collapsed into my brother Guilian's lap as I balled from the soul. The tears were uncontrollable. Moments after I regained composure, he walked over to me and said very matter of factly, "You need to stop teaching."

And just like that, my decision was made. I'd be lying if I said I didn't wrestle with this. My ego has grown very comfortable here in Tokyo and I felt like I'd only brushed the surface of what is possible. Yet an omen is an omen. And I feel as if I'd be disobeying a direct order, so to speak, if I chose to stay here despite what's been revealed.

That being said...I put a plan in action. One of my bestest buddies from childhood is getting married Thanksgiving weekend in New York. Hence, I had to figure a way to get back there in time for that. However, I am no fan of the cold. I have a month to kill between my estimated departure from Tokyo and the wedding. I'm not usually a fan of taking steps backwards, but this was a remarkable exception. The spirits of Santa Cruz beckoned! And I joyously heeded the call.

Not only will I be side-stepping some cold, but I'll be beach bumming at the same time! A formula for empowerment I do believe! Only time will tell exactly what dynamics manifest there. But here and now I am VERY excited to be returning to the States and rekindling some good-hearted friendships!

If you're gonna be in the area... Holla at ya boy!!!


  1. Wow, Free! You are definitely going to be missed. A sign is indeed a sign and good for you for doing what goes against your "ego" to heed it. Much love you!!

  2. I am envious of your life. Enjoy your last days in the Land of the Rising Sun. not sure what way flights bring you back this way but if PHX is an option i would love to see you.